Will the Sasquatch Kids Ever Learn?

A popular and collectible candy dispenser may have roots in the ancient practice of bending the necks of squirrels backwards until they cough up the contents of their cheeks. Unlike the popular toy, squirrels come with only one head and it can only be removed once – something many young Sasquatches learn the hard way.

Sasquatch Newbie on the Scent

A major Canadian newspaper recently published an article, provided by a major news source, which included the following:

Most experts consider the Bigfoot legend to be a combination of folklore and hoaxes, but there are a number of authors and researchers who think the stories could be true.

Among all Michigan counties, Marquette County has logged the most reported Bigfoot sightings with four, Mr. Moneymaker said.

In all but three of 30 expeditions in the United States and Canada, BFRO investigators have either glimpsed Bigfoot or gotten close enough to hear the creature, Mr. Moneymaker said.

Or gotten close enough to hear the creature?

We at Your Friday Sasquatch Report ask ourselves; who the BigF*&@ gives up the search for Sasquatch when they are close enough to hear it? We sent our summer intern on a mission to track down some of these half-milers and find out what sent them running for their lives.