Sasquatches love their chicken wings. In addition to traditional sauces such as hot, suicide and burning hoop, they also relish sweaty ass, teenage boy closet and Grandpa's Depends.
Long before chicken wings became popular with men who think it's okay to wear ball caps and sneakers on a European vacation, wing-fests were a big deal in the Sasquatch community.
Young adult males often shaved their chins in preparation for gorging orgies that would last up to three days. There's little doubt that this ritual was observed by early Canadian settlers as they railroaded innocent farmers and blew up immigrants.
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