Sasquatches Give Birth to Golf Ball

Golf balls may owe their dimpled texture to an ancient Sasquatch hunting ritual, according to a Sasquatch Scouts Training Manual. After inventing the boomerang, Sasquatch hunting parties developed elaborate pre-hunt rituals to coax luck onto their side. In one such ritual, the oldest member of the tribe, with teeth, would chew the boomerang, leaving tiny dimples across the surface. These dimples allowed skilled Sasquatch boomerang hunters to “bend it like Banacek” and hit targets hiding behind trees.*

* The tv series Banacek won an award from the "Polish-American Congress" for positively portraying a Polish-American on television. The cigars that George Peppard smoked on Banacek were Panatelas from Club 21 in New York City. He had smoked the same cigars as Hannibal Smith on "The A-Team". He eventually gave up smoking in 1992 after having a tumor removed from one of his lungs.